Connection - Part Eighteen
This episode is part of a larger story, Soft Touch. If you haven’t yet, you can go back and read it from the beginning right here.
I’m less than halfway awake, but I’m vaguely aware that there’s some sort of chain reaction going off in the living room.
Noah started it. He rolled over in Raj’s arms and kicked me in the process, causing me to draw up my knees and accidentally push Aiden towards the edge of the couch with them. His hand falls off and smacks Ripley’s knee, making him startle awake with a jolt in the armchair. His foot in its ratty skate shoe kicks the coffee table. A glass that was sitting there crashes to the floor, where it delicately shatters.
We all sit up in drowsy confusion, hearing a burst of happy giggles from Nikita.
“Good morning, boys,” Melanie says, as several pairs of befuddled eyes blink open to look at her. “Good to know you guys don’t even have to be awake to be causing problems. And I mean all of you, because somehow everyone was involved in that.”
“G’morning, angel,” Raj yawns, as Noah tries to roll back over and bury his face in his shoulder. “Are we late for something? What time is it…”
He sits bolt upright, sending Noah toppling to the floor, and blurts out – “Oh my god, Noah’s probably almost home! Do you think it went okay?”
“I’m home, dude,” Noah groans from the floor, having mercifully landed on the side of the coffee table that isn’t scattered with broken glass. “I appreciate you trying to wait up for me, though. It’s cute that you try. And that every time you think you’re gonna do it.”
Raj looks around, processes that it’s morning, and leans over the couch to talk to Noah. “How did it go? Victory? What happened?”
“I’ve been waiting to hear, too.” Mel goes around the shattered glass to set Nik down safely in her playpen, then looks at Noah with searching eyes. “Are you okay? And did Gage end up staying here last night? I had to leave for work right after he came back!”
Noah pauses in the middle of getting up from the floor. He breaks into a smile of bright relief, remembering what happened.
“Gage and Noelle stayed here,” he answers. “They’re up in the guest room.”
Raj’s eyebrows fly up, and Mel freezes.
“What?” she whispers, her eyes opening very wide, her mouth falling open in delight. “They’re in there together? Right now?”
Noah nods in confirmation. “She broke it off with Logan. He’s gone.”
It may only be news to Raj and Mel, but I think this is the first time that it really sinks in for any of us. We all glance around at each other, breaking into bright grins one by one as it hits us, then simultaneously dissolve into hushed, relieved laughter.
In my relief I get up from the couch and hug Noah. I’m extremely surprised when I receive a snuggly, enthusiastic hug in return, until I look up and realize that Noah dodged out of the way. I got Raj instead. But I’ll take it. Raj gives excellent hugs.
The front door opens, and Ralph pauses in surprise when his arrival gets a second, hushed burst of excited noise from all of us. He glances behind himself, then turns back to us, breathing out a bewildered laugh.
He spreads his hands in further confusion when his combat boots crunch on broken glass with his very first step into the house.
“It all worked out!” I blurt out happily, keeping my voice soft with great difficulty. “Oh, my god, thank god! I was trying to be optimistic, but the way things looked… Maggie called Logan a fool, and I was really holding onto that. I know we’re all fools, too, but – there’s a lot of us. Presumably a lot of fools is better than one fool, right?”
“Yeah, I think so,” Noah agrees, then reconsiders, his brows furrowing. “Or no, is it way worse? Which is it, Ralph?”
“Depends on the situation.” Ralph tosses his jacket over the back of the couch, then shakes out his hands. “Regardless, pretty sure the biggest fool of the night is Logan. D’you guys see how Calla ran down him through Big Belly Deli?” He turns to me, his sage eyes gone all dreamy. “Wasn’t that the cutest thing you’ve ever seen in your life?”
“The – the cutest?” I repeat uncertainly, images of Calla’s flaming, terrifying rage flashing through my mind.
“Hang on, bruh, what?” Raj sputters. “Calla ran Logan down through the Deli?”
“No!” Melanie gasps, breaking into an instant grin.
“We should have realized something like that was at risk of going down,” I tell Ralph, as he stares off adoringly into the middle distance, mentally reliving the view he had of it from the parking lot. “You know how much Calla can’t stand lying boyfriends. In this case the wronged girlfriend in question was half-crying, and holding Calla’s hand, and had just told her that she’s pretty.”
“Ooh.” Ralph lifts his eyebrows up high, then nods, like everything has been explained. “Yeah. That was going to happen, then. Unavoidable.”
“And you didn’t even see the part where Logan made a pass at Calla.”
Ralph looks sharply at me. “When – what?”
“Did she not tell you about that? Maybe she was concerned that you might actually kill him.”
“Okay, think it’s becoming obvious that we each only have small pieces of the story. We need to-” Aiden breaks off as everyone stops to stare at him. “What, what happened?”
“God, just your voice.” Now it’s my turn with the dreamy, smitten expression on my face. “It’s so deep. Especially first thing in the morning, when it’s all husky.”
“You know, some would say it’s rude to make the rest of us feel like little kids, Aiden,” Noah tells him irritably.
Ripley directs a wounded frown at Aiden, too. “I was going to be the one to complain about that.”
Aiden spreads his hands indignantly. “What exactly would you boys like me to do about it?”
“I’d like you to tell me how the hell you tracked Gage down so quickly, for one thing. You seriously had him waiting here for us by the time we got home?” Noah shakes his head in amazement. “I wasn’t expecting same-day service on that one.”
Aiden and Ripley break into twin grins of victory.
“Wouldn’t you know it, we found him in the first place Aiden suggested we look,” Ripley answers, feeling around in the pockets of his torn jeans for something.
“I knew he didn’t have money to get too far,” Aiden explains. “And he barely knows anyone around here besides us, so I was trying to think who he might turn to. Figured the pool couldn’t be that large.”
“So where’d you find him?” I ask curiously.
Ripley hands me what he took from his pocket. An elegant envelope of thick, cream-colored paper. It smells of expensive cologne, and there’s some impossibly beautiful handwriting on the front, which simply reads: James Keane.
“We were told to give that to you,” Ripley says, clearly holding back a laugh.
Baffled, I slip the notecard out of the envelope. In the same flourishing, pristine script as on the front, it reads:
My dearest Jamie,
The next time you send a boy this cute and heartbroken to my house, I will have sex with him. You’ve been warned.
All my love,
-F
“Oh, my god,” I groan, as Aiden and Ripley dissolve into laughter, and Noah, Ralph, and Raj – who were reading over my shoulder – do the same. “So now I’m responsible for this, somehow? I didn’t send him there! Not this time, anyways!”
Ralph’s eyebrows have gone up high again. “You’re telling me Gage turned up unannounced at Francesco’s house and Francesco let him stay? Wow. Gage must have looked, like – really sad.”
“Oh, you guys didn’t see it, it was terrible! The expression on his face!” I flinch at the memory alone, trying not to envision it. “Anyone would have let him stay! I’m just glad that he came back.”
“Yeah, he put up some fierce resistance,” Aiden yawns, pushing his tumbled chestnut hair out of his eyes. “But once we told him you’d never forgive him if he didn’t come with us, Noosh, he finally got in the car.”
“My man!” Noah answers, his voice cracking with fierce affection.
“Okay, I’m getting the coffee we so badly need.” Melanie strides off towards the kitchen, braiding her hair as she goes. “Then I need to hear everything that happened.”
“Shit, I haven’t even heard anything that happened.” Noah drags his hair out of the bun it was already ninety percent escaped from, glancing at me in confusion. “Ralph comes and picks me up from Mugshot, next thing I know I get a text from Jamie saying it’s okay for me to kill Logan-”
“That’s not even a little bit what my text said, dude!”
“Can someone grab the milk and sugar?” Mel pads back over to the coffee table, holding the kettle and an armful of mugs. “It’s all out on the counter. Mind the broken glass.”
“Hey, what did happen to Logan?” Ripley calls after Ralph, as he heads off towards the kitchen to help Melanie out. “Did you kill him?”
“Nah, he’s on his way back to France. He won’t show his face in Ketterbridge again. Doubt he’ll show it anywhere for at least a couple of weeks, actually. Or people will be asking what happened to him.”
“Wow,” Ripley calls back, with a devious grin. “The Warlord, letting that man live? Is someone losing their edge-?”
Without changing his pace or his facial expression in the slightest, Ralph turns around halfway to the kitchen and begins walking back the way he came. Ripley freezes, then takes a few hasty steps backwards, spreading his hands.
“Hey, man, Ralph, it’s cool! I was only-”
He breaks off as Ralph goes right past him, pours himself a cup of coffee from the kettle Mel brought over, and takes a long, contented sip from it.
Ripley blinks, then lets out a sputter of indignant laughter, trying unsuccessfully to scowl at him. “Wow. You really just wanted to make me look stupid, huh?”
Ralph lifts his coffee mug in acknowledgment, cracking a smile. “Yes, I did.”
“Hate you,” Ripley groans, throwing himself back into the armchair. “Why are you so scary?”
Aiden turns his amused blue eyes on Ripley. “Why poke the bear, Ripples? There’s the better question.”
“Oh, you should never poke a bear,” I put in, still only partially awake.
“Coffee,” Mel says firmly, handing around mugs. “It’s the same blend I drink before my super late-night events, so it’s as far as possible from decaf.”
“Grand,” I sigh happily, accepting the warm mug from her.
“Is it okay with you that Logan survived this night, Noah?” Ripley asks, taking his own coffee with an equally grateful sigh.
“For now I’ll deal with it, but Jesus Christ, if I ever see that guy ever again…” Noah’s inky hand tightens into a fist, which he very lightly taps against the back of the armchair, trying to take a breath. “I’m not gonna get violent-”
“Yes, you are,” Raj says fondly.
“Of course I am!” Noah answers forcefully, then catches himself as his voice begins to rise. Spreads his hands to show us he’s perfectly calm. “And before you start telling me off, Jamie-”
“Oh, I wasn’t going to!” I cut in, getting mad all over again. “I was tempted to spray him with my bear mace, listening to the lies he told Noelle about you and Gage!”
Noah pauses, blinking at me in alarm. “Okay, what happened at the hotel?”
“Oh, I only had to listen to Logan tell Noelle that you’re unstable, that you nearly attacked him at the lake house, that you and Gage were scheming together all along! Saying it was dangerous for her to invite you back into her life, since you just wanted to bring her down!”
This is met with such hard stares from everyone that for a second I think there’s going to be an explosion of rage in the living room. Several people start to speak at once, but Noah cuts ahead of everyone with: “What did she say?”
“She didn’t buy it for one second, obviously!” I widen my eyes at Noah when he stares at me in amazed relief. “Of course she didn’t, man, she was furious with him for saying any of it! I don’t even know how to describe – well, you’ve seen Noelle mad, haven’t you?”
“Yes.” Noah shudders at the memories. “She’s small, but she gets suddenly terrifying.”
“Yeah. Logan wasn’t ready for it. He leaned in hard on trying to make you and Gage look bad, and Noelle just – she dumped him. Packed her bags, and told me to send you that text which did not say that it was okay for you to go kill Logan. It all started to go downhill for Logan the second he started talking bad about you, though.”
Noah beams at me, visibly taken aback. “Shit, man. I’m sad I wasn’t there to see it.”
“Hey, of all the potential things to have to be sad about this morning, that one’s not too bad, is it?” Raj asks, catching Noah’s eye with a grin.
“Fuck, no!” he laughs, dimples appearing at the corners of his mouth, his eyes turning silvery.
Mel and Raj exchange a bright smile, relieved. I know they’ve been worried about Noah while he was endlessly stressed out about all this.
“Hang on,” Mel giggles, “Did you say Noelle is upstairs with Gage? In the bedroom? Right now?”
“Neither of them came out yet?” Noah yawns. “Noey has her clothes. I got up for like ten minutes really early this morning to check on Niki, and I put her suitcase outside her door.”
“Oh, really?” Mel pulls at her braid, her nose crinkling up with a mischievous grin. “How interesting. Noelle’s suitcase is gone. I guess they’re up, but don’t feel like coming out yet.”
Noah breathes out a tired laugh, rubbing his eyes. “To think I had to threaten him into this.”
Mel raises her eyebrows. “Did you? Okay. How many times do I have to ask before someone will tell me what happened last night?”
“I’ve got it.” Noah stretches his arms up over his head, then wraps them around Mel. “I’ll tell you and Raj everything. Just need some coffee in me first.”
“Yeah, and we should go home,” I yawn, leaning back against Aiden. “We need to feed the cats. Shower. Eat. Water the plants. I also need like ten more cups of coffee.”
“Come back for lunch,” Noah suggests, as we all start looking for our jackets. “This afternoon. Once we’ve all had a minute to get ourselves together, and clean up all the broken glass.”
That’s a plan that works for everyone, so we collectively drag ourselves towards the door, yawning and stumbling. It’s going to be a late lunch, I think. Something tells me we’re all headed home to catch some sleep in our own beds.
“Hey,” Noah murmurs, catching my arm. “Thanks, man.”
“For what?” I ask drowsily.
“For what?” Noah lifts his eyebrows incredulously. “Helping me and Gage out with all this. And especially for going with Noey to talk to Logan, even though I didn’t ask you about that ahead of time. I’m guessing since she was angry at me she probably shouted at you the whole way.”
“Yes, but it was about you, not me, so it was fine,” I answer, then let out an exhausted laugh when he shoves my shoulder. “No, seriously. It’s all good. Happy to help. It was so worth it. Besides, we’re always there for you.”
Noah breathes out a heavy sigh, rubbing his temples. “Will you stop saying nice things like that to me? How much can a man be asked to cope with in less than twenty-four-?”
He breaks off as Ripley comes up to us and slaps his shoulder.
“Text me if you need anything, right?” he yawns, running his paint-stained fingers through his curls. “Anything at all.”
Noah gives him a look of gratitude, then me a look of anguish. I bite my lip to hold back the laughter bubbling up in my chest.
Ripley heads for the door. Ralph comes over and holds out his hand to get a slap from Noah.
“See you,” he murmurs tiredly. “I’m gonna go join Calla and Tycho in bed. But my phone will be on, so if anything comes up just call me.”
“Cool,” Noah says raggedly, half-hiding his face in his hand. “Thanks, yeah.”
Ralph gives him a nod and follows Ripley outside, leaving me and Aiden in the entryway with him. Aiden – who missed our conversation while he was getting his Timbs laced – gives the side of Noah’s head an affectionate shove.
“Later, Noosh,” he says drowsily, lacing his fingers through mine. “Don’t forget to clean up the broken glass before someone gets hurt. And if we can help with anything else, just-”
“For fuck’s sake!” Noah blurts out abruptly, at a full-volume shout that instantly shatters the gentle hush of the house. “Everybody cut that shit out!”
Aiden lifts a bewildered eyebrow at this reaction, but decides it’s not strange enough to comment on. He slaps Noah’s shoulder fondly, then draws me out through the door into the sun-dappled autumn morning.
“Should we hug?” I ask Noah over my shoulder, offering him an open arm. “Just this once? To celebrate?”
“No,” he answers firmly. “Fuck off.”
He shuts the door in my face. Aiden and I exchange an affectionate grin, then set off together down the driveway. Behind us, Mel throws open the curtains in the living room, making room for the rosy sunshine to fall in through the windows. The brown leaves clinging to the tree branches have a burnished, coppery glow in this light, and the backlit ones have lightened to a pretty shade of apricot, gleaming at their edges. The day seems to have a special abundance of fall’s bright, earthy colors. Or maybe I’m just in a good enough mood to appreciate better what was already there.
I snuggle closer against Aiden, savoring the warmth of him against the cold bite of the morning breeze. I’m so excited to crawl into our bed with him. It’s been a tiring few days.
But like I told Noah, it was all worth it.
~~~~
I thought I was too awake to fall back asleep by the time we got home, but Aiden made me a hot bowl of oatmeal, thick with honey and cinnamon, with some creamy butter melted in it. After eating it I felt pleasantly warm inside, so I got cozy in our bed once I’d showered, just to lay down for a few minutes.
When I opened my eyes again, afternoon sunlight was turning the sky a soft orange-gold. To my delight, Jumble had wandered in and was perched in the window, inspecting the ruby tree for any signs of berries.
City Hall has a few small harvest events coming up to celebrate our local farmers. Aiden is helping set things up tonight, instead of going in for his usual working hours. So he’s there beside me when I slowly prop myself up to wave at Jumble, knuckling my eye with my other hand.
Aiden is deeply asleep. He tastes softly of cinnamon and honey when I gently kiss him awake.
I’m having one of those days when I feel wild with love for him. He looks irresistible to me. Just watching him sleepily blink those ocean eyes open is an unimaginable treat, and the warmth of him is perfect with the deepening autumn chill to the air.
We’ve been so busy that just to lay my head on his bare, slow-breathing chest, cuddled up close to him… it draws a sigh of deep relief from me.
It’s only with enormous reluctance that we drag ourselves out of bed again, but we’re both curious to see how things are going over at Nik’s house.
I use the drive over there to fill Aiden in on what he missed while he and Ripley were on their Gage-hunt. Enjoying the facial expressions, the stunned laughter that it draws from him on more than one occasion.
But there’s more that happened since then, and none of us know about it besides Gage and Noelle. No one knows exactly what went down after they went upstairs together.
I assumed things went well, and that’s why we haven’t seen them yet. Now I’m awake enough to fret a little. Did they talk things out? Maybe they just went upstairs and fell asleep for the night in exhaustion, leaving everything to be dealt with in the morning.
“That’s a real possibility, you know?” I glance anxiously at my Heliomancer as we walk up the driveway towards the house, then do a double-take. Noticing that there’s a significant bounce to his step. A glowing brightness to his blue eyes. “Wow. You’re in a good mood, aren’t you?”
“Feels like a weight has been lifted,” he sighs in relief, taking a deep breath. “I didn’t want to say anything, because I didn’t want to bum you out, but god, Noelle’s note sounded miserable when Gage was gone and she was engaged to Logan. Even though I couldn’t pick out her note, it was strong enough to change the whole, um – the whole sound. Especially with the rest of us worrying. And you should’ve heard Gage, too, when he left. God. It was painful.”
Aiden tilts his head back happily. Like he’s lifting it to the sunlight, even though it’s temporarily disappeared behind the clouds.
“Today everything sounds great,” he murmurs.
I can see why, as soon as we let ourselves through the house and out into the backyard.
Out here the chilly air is warmed somewhat by the grill. Raj has it glowing with low, rosy flames. He must have left the kitchen right before we walked through it, because he’s busy getting the food set up to cook. He’s also set up a table and chairs in the open area of the yard, placed as close to the warmth of the grill as they can get without being in the smoke.
But my attention immediately snaps to the long, low daybed that Raj and Noah built along the back of the house. Melanie is sitting there, with two Raunier men. Noah, and Lyam.
Noah is leaning casually back with his arms folded over his chest, but from his eyes I can see that he’s so excited to have his dad here that he’s not sure what to do with himself. Lyam has Nikita perched on his knee, his hands clasped around her little sides. He’s talking to her very sternly in French, while she beams up at him and giggles, tugging curiously at his scarf.
He puts his nose to hers, lowering his voice to a growl. She squeaks at him, then breaks out into laughter that makes her eyes close, grabbing him by his jet-black beard.
Lyam pauses, his solemn expression slipping. He directs an agonized look at Noah, who nods in understanding, like: I know. It’s too good. It hurts.
I feel about the same way right now, myself. I flash a delighted smile at Aiden as we walk over to say hello.
“Well, looks like everyone’s getting along here,” I laugh, coming to a stop in front of the daybed. “Not that I’m surprised.”
Lyam grins at me as he answers in French. Noah snickers, then translates: “He says she’s a spirited little thing already, which is what I deserve after what I put him through.”
Aiden huffs out a rumbling laugh, reaching out to shake Lyam’s hand. “I can’t wait to hear some of these stories.”
I liked Noah’s dad right away, and as we all lapse into a conversation I can tell that everyone else has come to the same conclusion. He has a warm presence, and a good-humored, laughing sparkle always resting in his grey eyes. There’s something about him that suggests he’s up for whatever, that you can tell him anything. And even with the slight language barrier, he has us all laughing pretty fast.
But Gage and Noelle, I notice, are still missing. They seem to have forgotten everything else and retreated completely into the extra bedroom to take a long, uninterrupted stretch of time alone together. When I ask Noah, he tells me in a bewildered voice that Noelle came downstairs for about two minutes to grab some coffee and pastries, and that for some reason she was wearing a large pair of demon horns. That’s all he’s seen of her.
“I assume things are good, though,” he adds. “She was smiling like – kind of like that Christmas when Dad went crazy and spent a fortune to get her that sixty-eight piece young artist discovery box.”
A smile flickers over Lyam’s face. “Do you remember how much it was, Noah?”
“Twenty dollars,” Noah tells me impressively, then pauses, reconsidering. “Huh. Being grown now, that actually doesn’t sound like a fortune. There were so many pieces, though. Felt at the time like he’d basically given her an art shop. That’s some advanced dad magic, right there. I’m keeping that trick in mind for Niki.”
Ralph and Ripley arrive with a cooler full of drinks. The ghosts appear and settle in together among the autumn leaves, enjoying the merry glow of the embers in the grill. The food is cooked up, and Raj starts moving it from the grill onto plates, and still no sign of the two who disappeared upstairs last night.
“There she is,” Noah laughs, when the door finally opens to let Noelle slip outside.
She blushes deeply. Her cheeks were already full of color, her hair slightly damp from a recent shower.
She looks disheveled and rumpled up, not as pristinely put-together as usual. But her grey eyes are shiningly bright, her skin has the soft glow of someone very well-rested, and a lingering smile is keeping the corners of her mouth turned up. She wore an oversized, cozy white sweater and loose jeans, and she looks adorable.
“Hello!” she says breathlessly, sounding a little flustered. “Sorry, we – we – slept in.”
Lyam’s eyebrows shoot all the way up as Gage follows Noelle outside. Lyam drops his grey eyes to their intertwined fingers, then breaks into a wide grin, turning to Noah.
“Told you I had a nice surprise for you,” Noah tells his dad, his dimples showing themselves.
“Oh, no one say anything!” Noelle crosses towards the grill, pointing a warning finger at her brother and her dad. “I’m not looking for opinions! I didn’t ask!”
Lyam answers her in French, getting to his feet and heading for Gage. Whatever he said makes her choke with laughter, then shake her head at him with fondness and relief.
Gage walked outside looking like he was staggered, operating on autopilot. He snaps back into the present now, apparently very startled by the greeting he receives from Lyam, who comes over to give his shoulder an affectionate squeeze, saying something very warmly to him in French. Gage answers him dazedly, and whatever he said makes Lyam laugh.
Lyam quickly grows serious again, though. He asks Gage something, gesturing at Noelle. Gage blushes, then slowly shrugs his shoulders, looking at him with nervous eyes.
Lyam grins at him, gives his shoulder a gentle slap, and says firmly: “Good.”
Gage blinks at him, caught by surprise, then smiles in grateful relief, just like Noelle did.
Once they’ve talked for a few minutes Noah comes to get his dad, so he can check out the car. Gage comes over to join us at the table. He drops down into the empty chair, pushing his dark brown hair out of his face.
“Hey, boys,” he stammers, taking something from his pocket. “What’s – what’s going on?”
Aiden closes his eyes, hearing the burst of bright happiness in my note.
I remember the shape Gage was in when he got on the bus to leave Ketterbridge. He was gazing around at the world like suddenly it was empty, for him.
Now he looks like someone who’s been hit with a lightning bolt of pure happiness, who’s struggling to process what just happened.
I’m sitting closest to him, so I lean over, push a beer his way, and try gently:
“Hey, man. How we doing?”
“Tell you the truth, I’m having a hard time keeping up, Jamie Keane,” he answers in his even, contemplative voice, getting to work on rolling a cigarette. “Having a strange time of things.”
“I’m sure,” I answer sympathetically.
“Just yesterday I thought this week would be my ultimate ruin. My downfall, if you will.”
“I – alright. I will.”
“Now it’s like-” He lifts his helpless green and brown eyes to me. “I mean, I don’t even have a point of reference for – for feeling like this.”
I smile fondly at him, unable to help myself. He looks like he’s had his every unhoped-for dream come true at once, and it’s clear that his heart is struggling to bear up under it all.
“If – if one more incredible thing happens to me,” he begins, “I might break down and-”
He breaks off and looks down, realizing that Nikita just tottered up to his chair.
She plucks him by his sleeve, then proudly shows him the now half-crushed autumn leaf she brought over. Gage blinks at her, then automatically holds out his palm. Nikita drops the leaf onto it, like a little gift.
Gage stares at it, then lifts his enormous, suddenly misty eyes to me.
“No, Gage, it’s okay!” I laugh, patting his knee. “You’re doing great!”
“Am I?” he asks waveringly.
“Yes! Just enjoy it. Just let yourself enjoy it. Hey, can someone take Nik? She’s too cute for Gage, right now.”
“Here, Nik.” Aiden offers her the football he brought over. “Why don’t you give that a try? You’re not too little to get started, are you?”
Nik extends her tiny hands, accepts the football from Aiden. She has to put both of her arms all the way around it, and it seems to tip her already precarious balance. Hugging the ball to her chest, she sort of slow-motion falls to sit down on a pile of crimson and amber leaves, surprising herself tremendously.
“There’s my phone background for autumn,” Raj says, snapping a picture of her as he sets another plate on the table. “Okay, that plate is the meat with the sweet orange habanero rub, this other one has the key lime jerk seasoning. Potato salad is nice and cold, so let’s hand that around now. Gage, I know you don’t like dill, so I made this little bowl without-”
“Oh, god,” Gage murmurs desperately, staring at the smaller bowl of potato salad with anguished, overcome eyes. “I’m dying. It’s too much and I’m dying. This is it, this is how I go.”
“No!” I tell him reassuringly, then quickly catch Raj’s alarmed eyes and shake my head. “No, he’s fine! You’re doing great, Gage. Have some potato salad.”
“Okay,” he says brokenly, pulling the bowl towards him. “Thanks, Raj.”
“You’re – you’re welcome, brother. Everything all good? And – Aiden, are you good, my man?”
I think what’s happening to Aiden is that Gage is causing him some difficulty. Both by making me happy, and being so staggeringly happy himself. Everyone else is in such a good mood, too… the soul notes must be soaring high today.
As a result, our resident Guardian looks almost stoned. Peaceful, sleepy, unwound, with his eyes closed and his chin propped on his palm. Like he’s been rocking gently in a hammock on a warm beach all day long.
“He’s fine!” I answer quickly, catching Aiden by his shoulder as he slumps towards the table. “So is Gage. Everything is – totally normal.”
“Well, by our standards,” Raj agrees. He drops down in front of his own plate, his dark brown eyes very bright. “God, I’m feeling great. Got to meet my father-in-law, have my baby meet her grandpa. See Noah so happy.”
“It’s the best,” Mel agrees, beaming at Raj as she pulls Nik up onto her lap.
No wonder Aiden is getting a little high. Just all around. Maybe we’re all contributing?
Gage suddenly seems to remember something. He sets aside his unlit cigarette and slips something else from his pocket. It’s the letter, I realize after a second of staring at it sideways. The one he wrote to Noelle. She must have given it back to him.
He leans over, drops it onto the smoldering coals in the grill, and breathes out a sigh of infinite relief as it erupts into a fluttering burst of fire.
“Can’t believe she didn’t read it,” he murmurs quietly, letting his adoring eyes drift to Noelle. “Can’t believe she’s just gonna let me tell her.”
Yeah, I don’t think Gage is used to people letting him speak for himself. He’ll have to get used to it now, though.
Noelle is standing at the little table by the grill, setting up the Citron Pressé to go with the food. She smiles and looks up as her dad comes back out into the yard with Noah. Lyam quietly leans down to say something to her as Noah joins us at the table, and whatever he said makes her crinkle her nose up in laughter. If he has any objections to the rearrangements made in Noelle’s personal life in the last twenty-four hours, it doesn’t show.
“Gage, my guy,” Noah sighs happily, dropping down into a chair. He considers the two different platters of meat, then drags both of them towards himself. “Man, am I happy to see you. My dad is, too.”
“I know, he – he like, remembered me, and he seems happy about…” Gage gestures vaguely at Noelle, blushing. “Did you know Noelle was gonna do that, last night? Is that why you told me to come back?”
“I had no idea she was gonna do that, or that you would be here. We just wanted you to come back. But I’m sure as hell glad it happened.” Noah breathes out a sigh of relief, making an absolute tower of potato salad on his plate. “Things are as they should be, now. Perfection. Mel is even baking those special Halloween brownies she does, with the orange sprinkles and the little marshmallow ghosts.”
Aiden had already closed his eyes again to listen to the way things sound, right around the point when Noah started telling Gage that this is, in his opinion, the way things should be. Gage only blinked fast a few times during the rest of that conversation, but it must have caused a big enough reaction in him for Aiden to pick it up in his note. And then there must have been a little follow-up bump of happiness from everyone else at the mention of Melanie’s brownies. I’m certain that I contributed to it.
“Also, I just gotta say it, dude,” Noah adds, catching Gage’s eye. “Your family sucks.”
“I know,” Gage answers dazedly, drawing an audible breath. “That’s why I’m glad they didn’t want me.”
“Well, whatever,” Noah tells him cheerfully. “You belong with ours, anyways.”
Again, Gage just sits there and blinks at Noah, but something must have happened inwardly, because Aiden’s chin slips off of his palm. I catch him by his shoulder before his head can smack into the table, then grab his arm and pull him to his feet.
“We’re just gonna say hello to Noelle,” I explain hastily, dragging my happy-high Guardian after me. “Back in a minute!”
Clearly it’s too much for Aiden at the table right now, especially with Noah’s dad joining the group.
Noelle is still squeezing lemons into the pitcher, filling it up with fresh juice. Much to my surprise, Ralph is standing there, talking to her while she works.
He looks surprised about it, too, and a little confused. I’m guessing he didn’t initiate this conversation. All this time he’s mostly avoided one on one conversations with Noelle, and generally been quieter around her. Keeping himself on the edge of the group when she’s there.
“-can tell when someone’s gonna call the cops,” he’s saying firmly, when we come up to join him. “Logan won’t.”
“You seem to know a lot about it,” Noelle observes, watching Ralph through narrowed eyes. “Did you grow up in a rough neighborhood before you moved here? Lots of cops patrolling around?”
Ralph lets out a sputter of laughter at the thought. “Oh, the cops would never go into my neighborhood. Guess they figure they don’t get paid enough for that kind of risk.”
Noelle breathes out a laugh, shaking her head. “I begin to understand you a tiny bit, Ralph.”
He blinks at her in surprise, taken aback by the faint trace of warmth in her voice.
The door of the house opens again, this time to let Calla and Tycho out.
“Calla!” Noelle calls, reaching for her with obvious enthusiasm. “Oh, yes! One of my favorite people!”
“Oh my god, are you alright?” Calla asks sympathetically, striding over to her. “After the night you had?”
“Better than alright! I have so much to tell you.”
Ralph watches in amused confusion as Calla and Noelle exchange an affectionate hug. “Didn’t you two meet yesterday?”
This doesn’t get an answer, because the girls are already deep in conversation. Ralph lets out a soft laugh, turning away, then pauses to look at Noah.
He’s eagerly talking to his dad, helping Nikita with his inky hands as she totters over towards her grandpa.
I watch them fondly, then take a closer look at Ralph. His shoulders just sank with the long exhale he let out, his eyes briefly closing.
“Hey,” I try, curious about the relief written all over his face. “What are you thinking about?”
He shakes his head, opening his eyes again but not looking at me. “Just – my crimes.”
“Really? Your crimes? I never imagined you were sorry for any bit of law-breaking you’ve done, not for one minute.”
Ralph flashes me an exasperated sidelong glance. “Fuck no, man, not those kinds of crimes, I’m not sorry for those. What do you want me to do, grovel to the fuckin’ law? Let the government tell me what’s ethical? The government? The American government?”
“Yeah, this sounds more like you.”
“I mean the other kind of crimes, the – soul crimes. I’m…” He hesitates, then nods at Noah, his dad, and his sister. “I’m glad I didn’t permanently ruin everything. ‘Cause that’s, you know, one of those thoughts that’ll sneak up on you at night and wreck you while you were just trying to fall asleep. Especially when it’s Noah you did that to.”
I stare at Ralph in affectionate surprise, then glance up at Aiden as he sways on his feet, hearing Ralph’s happiness and relief on top of everything else.
Okay. Maybe back to the table, then. I catch his hand and lead him over there, but Ralph, who doesn’t know there’s a problem, follows us right over to it.
“Ralph, want to hit this spliff?” Noah asks, busy lighting it up.
“Please,” Ralph answers, then raises his eyebrows when Noah hands it off to his dad, who puffs on it a few times before he hands it over.
“Oh, okay.” Ralph breathes out a laugh, accepting it from him. “Nice to find something that transcends cultural barriers. Here I was wondering what your dad would think of this type of food, much less what he’d think of us smoking a spliff.”
“I like this food,” Lyam answers in his heavily accented English. He directs a look of warm approval at Raj, who instantly beams at him. “This is not the first time I come to Ketterbridge. Only the first time in a long time.”
“Why don’t you visit more often?” Noah asks, filling up his own plate with seconds. “You used to, when we were little.”
“I don’t know. I lost the – the-?”
“Habit?” Noah offers, when Lyam looks at him uncertainly.
“The habit.” He lifts his face to the sunlight, which has fallen back out from behind the clouds. “Forgot that I like it here very much.”
“Maybe you should get back into it, ‘cause you could come see all of us,” Noah points out, tapping the top of Nikita’s head. “And Mom, too. She’d like that.”
His dad smiles at him, then down at Nik, who’s still quite enamored with the football.
“Maybe I should,” he says thoughtfully, sounding very much like he means it.
Noah breaks into a hopeful smile, the corners of his mouth dimpling again, and Aiden quickly drops his head behind me to hide the dreamy, stoned expression on his face. Oh, god. It’s no better for him over here. The situation pretty much can’t get any more -
Lyam leans over to me, detaching himself from the conversation going on at the table, and asks quietly – “I’m bad with names, but you’re Jamie, isn’t it?”
“Yes! It’s been really nice to meet you…”
I trail off uncertainly. I was about to call him Lyam, but I realized at the last second that I’m not sure about what’s respectful when it comes to using first names with people from France. Is it different there? I should have asked Noah.
Without noticing my awkward pause, Lyam says appreciatively – “Noah tells me you helped him a lot.”
“Oh – with what?”
“He didn’t say one thing, I think he means it more…”
He does a sweeping gesture of his hand, as if to say: just in general.
“Oh,” I manage unsteadily, putting my own hand over my heart. “Well, I – I-”
“I just wanted to say thank you,” Lyam finishes warmly, then gives me a very serious look of warning. “But between you and me, only. If Noah asks, I have not said nothing, okay?”
“Okay,” I answer, in a wavering voice.
Aiden slumps into me from behind.
“Can we go somewhere I can just lay down and listen to this?” he sighs quietly in my ear.
Yep, the table isn’t safe. Now because of me, too. I seize Aiden’s arm and pull him back towards Noelle. We didn’t get to talk to her like I meant to, anyways.
“Hey, Noelle!” I stop beside her, and Calla goes around us, off to get some food. “How are you feeling? You look – just – great!”
In fact, she looks – healthier, almost? There’s a brighter glow to her, a lively sparkle in her eyes, a warm flush to her cheeks. She looks like she just got a week of good sleep.
I wonder how much it was taking out of her, to be with Logan. All the resisting of her ideas, fending off her own instincts, operating under extreme self-control at all times – that sounds exhausting to me. Like something that would drain a person’s strength and energy nonstop.
“I feel…” She lets out a long, slow breath, pausing over the half-squeezed lemon in her hands. “Sort of like I did when I started meditating.”
I tilt my head to the side in confusion, and she lifts her grey eyes to my face.
“I was trying to find ways to deal with some, um – anxiety that I was having. The meditation guide at the class I went to said that even just like three minutes a day can help. Each class was half an hour, so that’s plenty of time to try and get three minutes of successful meditation in, right?”
She lets out a frustrated sigh at the memory.
“And I couldn’t fucking do it! It was horrible. Like, focus on a peaceful mental image, let any thoughts just drift by and go past you. Let your mind be quiet. It’s just that, and I was completely stressing myself out trying to make it happen. I was so frustrated after every class. Kept falling asleep on the train afterwards, I was so tired.”
She catches my eye, slicing another lemon.
“Then I realized I actually could do it. I just had to be sitting in a nice hot bath, alone in my apartment.” She tucks a strand of inky hair behind her ear, then spreads her hands at me, her eyes blazing with self-directed exasperation. “Once I figured it out I was like, why did I think that was the right way to try it? In an unfamiliar room in the middle of the city, surrounded by strangers, wearing my work clothes? Of course I couldn’t relax or get comfortable that way!”
“Oh… yeah, that does sound difficult.”
“Right! How could that be better than my cozy apartment that I love, on my own time, once I was done with everything for the day? I was literally picturing my bathtub while I was sitting there in the class! It was my peaceful mental image!”
Noelle lets out a helpless sigh, shaking her head.
“It was so obvious, I should have known… I should have known. And that’s how I feel right now.” She lifts her head, crinkles up her nose, and adds – “You know what’s tough about adulthood? A lot of the time you don’t even realize how – how untested a lot of things are, for you. And then it’s nerve-wracking to test them out, because – they’re – untested. Do you know what I mean?”
“Yes, and you have no idea how validating it is to hear that,” I laugh sympathetically. “Especially given that you’re a couple years older than me. I feel better, now.”
She laughs softly, carefully cuts another lemon in half. “Well… at least it feels really, really good when you do test something new out, and it turns out to be…”
She trails off, stealing an adoring glance at Gage. In his usual way, he’s saying something with a tone and facial expression that would suggest he’s explaining the intricacies of some important thesis. Whatever he’s actually saying has caused Ralph’s eyebrows to shoot up, Ripley to grin enormously, and Lyam to drop his head with barely-contained laughter.
“-for a magazine called Strumpfbänder,” Gage finishes. “Sort of an, um – specialty magazine? For men, by men.”
Calla, the only German-speaking one among us, lets out a sharp choke of laughter into her beer and has to set it down as it starts spilling on her.
Noelle watches Gage with grey eyes brimming with love. Then she blinks in surprise, realizing she absolutely crushed the lemon half in her hand. All the juice is already in the pitcher.
She looks up at the sky as if asking for help, then dissolves into giggles as she sets the last lemon aside and starts drying off her hands.
“It feels good,” she says again, with a sigh of relief. “Although I do feel a little stupid. Noah and I used to say that we both might be dumb, but we can figure things out between the two of us. Good to have him back for that.”
“Hey, don’t beat yourself up for not realizing sooner,” I tell her earnestly, and then, getting mad again - “Logan was lying to you and confusing you on purpose, the dirty bastard! That’s part of why we’re all happy to see the back of him.”
“I know… fuck him, I’m not gonna let him make me feel dumb. I more meant – being wrong about what I wanted. That one does make me feel dumb.”
“Oh. I mean… were you wrong, though?” I ask slowly, blinking at Noelle in surprise. “It sounded to me like you wanted something stable, consistent, and steady, right? That may not be Gage’s – um – personality, exactly-”
“He’s pure havoc, you can say it,” she answers firmly, drawing a laugh from me. “Even if he looks and sounds like pure calm.”
“Alright, fine. Yes. But the way he feels about you… I don’t think you could rely on anything else to be more stable and consistent and steady than that.”
Besides, Rauniers need lives rich in commotion, I think, but don’t add out loud. Gage is good for that, too.
Noelle blinks a few times, then smiles warmly at me.
“I’m glad that my brother has good people around him now,” she answers, then picks up the pitcher and heads for the table.
I stare after her with a hand over my heart, deeply taken aback.
There’s a thump from behind me as Aiden sits down heavily on the daybed. I turn around to find him about to stretch out on it.
“Think I might just lay down and listen to this for a while,” he tells me.
“Nope – okay-” I hastily catch his shoulder, then twist around to call out over mine. “Hey, Noah!” He doesn’t hear me, so I add, more loudly – “Raunier!”
Noelle, Lyam, and Noah immediately look up, with such perfectly matching, automatic no, it wasn’t me, I didn’t do anything, why am I in trouble facial expressions that I nearly burst out laughing.
“Aiden and I are heading out,” I call over.
Noah gets up and crosses the backyard to see us off, then breaks into a huge, baffled grin at the sight of Aiden’s stoney facial expression. He goes over to ask him what’s going on, and Gage wanders up to me.
“You hanging in there, Gage?” I ask gently.
“Yeah. I am a little concerned that maybe I died and went to heaven, though.”
I laugh in answer, and he laughs, too, but then gives me a worried, uncertain look.
“No – Gage, no, you didn’t,” I assure him earnestly, suppressing another laugh. “You’re fine.”
“Okay. Just having a hard time believing that, given all the-”
He breaks off as Noelle comes up from behind him and winds her arms around his lanky waist.
“Come sit with me,” she purrs warmly.
“Yeah, cool, for sure,” he immediately agrees.
“I had an idea,” she tells him, leading him back towards the table.
He breaks into an adoring smile. “Then let’s do it, Bug. I’m up for whatever it is.”
“I was thinking maybe we should go traveling around the countryside again, when we go back to France. Just you and me, this time. Maybe go to the Riviera, stay in a cute auberge, work as we go. Hit all the places we didn’t get to visit the first time. You said you wanted to see Villefranche, right? Didn’t you tell me that once?”
Gage blinks at her a few times, then looks wildly at me over his shoulder. I give him an encouraging smile, mouth back you’re fine again, and turn back to Aiden.
“Oh, my god!” I sputter, bursting into instant laughter at the blissed-out expression on his face. “Noah, couldn’t you have let me know we were hitting some kind of critical point, here?”
“Think I might be adding to it, dude,” Noah answers, watching Aiden with obvious amusement. “Also, most of it happened in the last, like, two seconds. He looks like he’s on a really good trip. I’m jealous.”
“Help me sit him up, if we get him on his feet he’ll start going.”
Together we manage to drag Aiden upright. After a minute or so I’m pulling him around the side of the house, back towards my car.
“The amount of chaos Gage causes,” I laugh, supporting Aiden’s weight as best I can. “Without ever realizing it. He doesn’t even know he’s responsible for this!”
I punctuate that with a gesture at Aiden, who draws up short and stops me as a bird flutters up from the roof of the house. It dislodged something in the process, dropping it in front of us. A large, broken wedge of pumpkin. Presumably from Mel’s attempted jack-o’-lantern, the one that ended up on the roof after whatever idea Noelle had about how to fix it.
Aiden and I stare at the piece of pumpkin, then dissolve into simultaneous laughter.
“Alright, point taken, universe. Noelle is responsible for this, too.”
“Honestly,” Aiden laughs, managing to pull himself upright as we put some space between us and everyone in the backyard.
He takes off his snapback and stretches out in the passenger’s seat when we get into my car, peacefully folding his muscled arms behind his head.
“Why do I have to stop listening to all this, again? Sounds great. Wish you could hear it, Linden. You’re the best part of it, as always.”
I blush to my ears, trying to pull a firm expression onto my face. “You have to stop because you have work very soon, and you can’t show up all happy-high, looking like a puppy who got to spend all day at the beach! That’ll raise some questions, especially because you’re sober.”
“Good point.” He rubs his eyes, laughing softly. “Funny, Keane, I never remember having this kind of problem before you and I were together. I never remember this town sounding so good.”
I smile at him, picking at the wheel. “Well – this town has a pretty great, active Guardian now. He’s really on top of things.”
A huge, warm hand reaches across the car to gently cuff my cheek. “He’s got good help.”
I lovingly smooth my fingers over his chestnut hair, then quickly take my hand back before I can make him go sinking down into the passenger’s seat to listen again. We really do have to get to City Hall.
“Speaking of help,” I answer, starting the car, “Do you need help tonight, setting up for this harvest event?”
“It’s a work thing,” he rumbles, sitting up some more, blinking his striking blue eyes back open. “No one asked for volunteers.”
“I know, but I’m happy to help! Means I get to hang out with you. Besides, that would be helping out both you and Gabby, so I’m double happy to-”
“No, man, don’t start doing a Jamie thing right now!” Aiden protests suddenly, clamping a hand over my mouth. “Now it’s me who sounds too – stop it!”
He’s right, I think. Neither of us should say anything. Something tells me that would only make the problem worse, as will staying here by Nik’s house even a second longer.
It’s a nice problem to have, though.
I kiss Aiden’s forehead, then put the car in drive.
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